Helping a child to adjust to the news of your divorce can be a challenge. If you have more than one child, you may find that what works for one doesn’t really help another. It’s imperative that you do what you can to make the transition as easy as possible for them.
Many children will think that they are to blame for the divorce. They might assume that it won’t happen if they behave better. You will have to reassure them that the decision to end the marriage was based on the adults and not them.
They are going to go through a range of emotions. Younger children might not have a full grasp on what they are feeling. Older children might have difficulties coping with the emotions. Opening up discussions with them and making it clear that they are experiencing normal feelings for a person in this position may help them to deal with things.
You need to keep conflict away from the children. This includes speaking negatively of your ex. Kids are going through a situation they likely view as negative, so you don’t need to add anything else to that. Instead, discuss matters directly with your ex when the kids aren’t around.
The parenting plan that you set can play a big role in how the children adjust to the situation. Try to keep things as consistent as possible for them, and always make decisions based on what’s best for them. Be sure that the plan addresses their needs right now because it is possible to modify the plan as they mature.