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How much do you tell the kids about an affair?

| Mar 13, 2020 | Child Custody |

The entire family is impacted when one spouse decides they are going to be unfaithful. One question that many parents have in this situation is whether the kids need to know or not. The short answer is that it depends on the situation. Thinking about the following factors might help you determine whether to tell your kids or not.

Are you staying married?

If you and your spouse decide that you’re going to remain married and work things out, you may not need to tell the kids. Sometimes, older children might know that something is wrong and will ask questions. Both parents need to decide what to say and how much information to give in these cases.

If you aren’t staying married, you might mention the infidelity when you’re explaining the situation. It’s imperative that you think about your child’s maturity level when you decide how much or little to tell them. For example, you wouldn’t want to overwhelm an early elementary age student with the details of an affair, but a high school student might be able to understand limited points.

Do they know the other person?

When an affair happens with someone who is close to the children, it can be hard for the kids to understand why that person is suddenly staying away. In this case, you might have to let them know so that they can have closure.

When a divorce is the only answer, you have to ensure that you’re considering your options. Each decision you make can have a profound impact on your future, so be sure you’re doing what you feel is best.